Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery

• Oops!
• Has anyone seen my watch?
• That was some party last night. I can't remember when I've been that drunk.
• Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
• Well this book doesn't say that... What edition is your manual?
• Okay, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
• Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
• Come back with that! Bad Dog!
• Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
• Hand me that... uh... that uh... thingie...
• If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week.
• Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
• Damn, there go the lights again...
• Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em.
• Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
• Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off.
• I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
• Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
• Steril, shmeril. The floor's clean, right?
• What do you mean, he's not insured?
• This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
• Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
• Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
• What do you mean you want a divorce?!
• I don't know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice.
• Let's hurry, I don't want to miss "Bay Watch"
• That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that?
• Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he's still moving.
• Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?
• Of course I've performed this operation before, Nurse!
• FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!