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Every year there are more product-liability awards, and every year manufacturers have to put more warnings in the owners' manuals, and every year the radish-brains come up with newer, more innovative ways to injure themselves.

There will come a day when every product you buy will come with an actual living lawyer inside the box, sealed in plastic; as soon as you break the seal, the lawyer will emerge and start preparing your product-liability lawsuit.

(This system is feasible because product-liability lawyers are spore-based organisms who can survive for years without air.)

- Dave Barry

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Disclaimer: The jokes, sayings, movies, etc., that are contained on this site do not reflect the views of this company or any company associated with it. This site posts jokes circulating the internet, this company is neither the author nor should we be considered a publisher of any of the jokes. If any of the items on these pages are copywritten, please let us know and we will give credit where credit is due or remove them from our pages.If you find any of these items offensive, we apologize, learn to laugh at yourself. If you can't laugh at yourself, you have no right to laugh at anyone else.