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Tidbits

Practice makes perfect, but if nobody's perfect, why practice?

Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Middle age is when you burn the midnight oil around 9:00 pm.

It's easier to curse a candle than light the darkness.

An egotist has one point in his favor - he doesn't go around talking about other people!

Viewer discretion may be advised, but it's never really expected.

Sign on the wall above a toilet: "Flush only Toilet Paper."

I don't drive fast, I fly low.

Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.

We don't swim in your urinals. Please don't pee in our pool.

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Disclaimer: The jokes, sayings, movies, etc., that are contained on this site do not reflect the views of this company or any company associated with it. This site posts jokes circulating the internet, this company is neither the author nor should we be considered a publisher of any of the jokes. If any of the items on these pages are copywritten, please let us know and we will give credit where credit is due or remove them from our pages.If you find any of these items offensive, we apologize, learn to laugh at yourself. If you can't laugh at yourself, you have no right to laugh at anyone else.