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Maineiac Home Page Religious Top Page See What's New! Aging Jokes Animal Jokes Barbie Doll Jokes Blonde Jokes Clinton Jokes Computer Jokes Doctor Jokes Drinking/Bar Jokes Driving Jokes Education Jokes Ethnic/Country Jokes Ethnic/Country Stuff Holidays Inspirational Stuff Kid Jokes Knock-Knock Jokes Lawyer/Legal Jokes Marriage Jokes Men Jokes Miscellaneous Jokes Miscellaneous Stuff On The Job Jokes Police Jokes Political Jokes Political Stuff Redneck Jokes Religious Jokes Sport Jokes State Jokes Tips & Tricks Wife Jokes Women Jokes Yo' Momma Jokes Games Battleship Checkers Sokoban Stars Connect 4 Blackjack Tailgunner	Little Gems All of these little gems purportedly came from signs found outside of churches: "No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace." "Free trip to Heaven. Details inside!" Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!" "God so loved the world that He did not send a committee." "Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!" "When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out alright." "Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday." "Fight truth decay --- study the Bible." "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world." "It is unlikely there will be a reduction in the wages of sin." "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to the church." "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns." "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again." "This is a ch__ch. What's missing? ----- U R !!" "In the dark? Follow the Son!" Church Parking Lot Sign: "FOR MEMBERS ONLY. Trespassers will be baptized!!" An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads: "For fast, fast relief, take two tablets." When the restaurant next to another Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open Sundays, too."	Send This Page to Friend or Foe! SUBMIT A JOKE! Please don't change the pre-set subject line of the e-mail you send. If you change the subject line, we won't get your joke :)
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