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Surefire Ways To Know You're A Woman When asked "Is something bothering you?" reply "NO" then get mad when you are believed. Become attracted to someone because he is outgoing and loves parties, start dating him and immediately expect him to stop this behavior. Always take an hour longer than promised to prepare for the evening. Always hide very important events in very unimportant terms so you can have something to be mad about when your boyfriend declines because he has pressing business, i.e. You say "It's no big deal, but I was wondering if you would like to visit my parents with me if you are not busy this weekend." when you mean "It means a great deal to me for you to see my family with me this weekend whether or not it is possible!" Whine. If you are trying to sleep, it's because you're exhausted from your almost super-human level of daily achievement; if he is trying to sleep, it's because he is lazy. No matter what the activity, he doesn't do it as well as a past boyfriend. If he pays attention to you, he is smothering you. If he gives you space, he is ignoring you. Complain. Hate any bar that he likes. Demand to be treated as an equal in everything........except when paying for meals, airplane tickets, concerts, beers, clothes, etc.......... these are required gifts proving his love. Declare PMS at any given time. If he is knowledgeable about your cycle, tell him you're irregular from all of the stress in your life Remember that ANY woman who so much as looks at your boyfriend must be labeled cheap and your network of friends must be informed immediately to spread this as quick as possible. Make his life miserable by making him feel guilty about doing anything other than catering to your needs. Break into tears for no apparent reason Ask for help in some endeavor then become livid when it is given. Insert yourself into your boyfriend's group of friends, break up with him, then make sure you are present at every gathering for the next month just to rub it in. Tell your boyfriend it is OK to go out with another girl, who is just a friend, and get mad when he does.
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Disclaimer: The jokes, sayings, movies, etc., that are contained on this site do not reflect the views of this company or any company associated with it. This site posts jokes circulating the internet, this company is neither the author nor should we be considered a publisher of any of the jokes. If any of the items on these pages are copywritten, please let us know and we will give credit where credit is due or remove them from our pages.If you find any of these items offensive, we apologize, learn to laugh at yourself. If you can't laugh at yourself, you have no right to laugh at anyone else. All Pages Copyright 2000-2006. A2Z Computing Services. All Rights Reserved |
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