Your Christmas decorations include a half a yard of sand and l00
paper bags.
You think a red traffic light is merely a suggestion.
All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but
clear out come the end of April.
You think someone driving a car wearing oven mitts is clever.
Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El" or Los".
You think 60 tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.
You've signed so many petitions to recall governors that you can't
remember the name of the incumbent.
You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.
You can say "Hohokam" and people don't think you're laughing funny.
You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the
Salt River.
You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
You can say, "115" degrees without fainting.
Every other vehicle is a 4x4.
You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour and it will be over
l00 degrees.
Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
People break out coats when the temperature drops below 70 degrees.
You discover, in July, it only takes two fingers to drive your car.
The pool can be warmer than you are.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so you can
use your fireplace.
Most homes have more firearms than people.
Kids will ask, "What's a mosquito?"
People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are
automatically assumed to be from out-of-state.
You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead
of distance.
The AC is on your list of best friends.
Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 6:00.
You realize that Valley Fever isn't a disco dance.
You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.
The water from the cold water tap is the same temperature as the
hot one.
You can (correctly) pronounce the words: "Saguaro," "Ocotillo,"
"Tempe," "Gila Bend," "San Xavier," "Canyon de Chelly," "Mogollon
Rim," "Cholla," and "Ajo."
It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person
is walking on the streets.
You experience third degree burns if you touch any metal part of
your car.
You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're
wearing shorts.
Announcements for Fourth of July events never end with "in case
of rain......"
When someone asks how far you live from a location, it's always
in terms of minutes, not miles.
Everyone's smiling and talking about the great weather on rainy
days.
Disclaimer:
The jokes, sayings, movies, etc., that are contained on this site do not reflect
the views of this company or any company associated with it. This site posts
jokes circulating the internet, this company is neither the author nor should
we be considered a publisher of any of the jokes. If any of the items on these
pages are copywritten, please let us know and we will give credit where credit
is due or remove them from our pages.If you find any of these items offensive,
we apologize, learn to laugh at yourself. If you can't laugh at yourself,
you have no right to laugh at anyone else.
